Ok, so my heroes date me. Whatever. We can throw Diego Forlan and Landon Donovan in the mix for kicks. Or Evan Lysacek, because I have to admit that it is really the athletes who excel in individual sports that most impress me.
I vividly remember watching the 1988 Summer Olympics. Well, the parts my parents taped for me to watch the next day. That year Janet Evans was smashing records in swimming -- somewhere, we have (or had) the final few laps of her world-record setting 400M freestyle on tape. On the same tape was the women's gymnastics all-around, won by Elena Shushunova, sliver to Daniela Silivas, bronze to Svetlana Boginskaya. I watched the tape over and over. And went to gymnastics class.
I was equally obsessed with the 1992 Summer Olympics -- only this time I was old enough to know about it ahead of time, and watch parts, and tape whole segments of competition, which I watched over and over again afterward. A tall 13-yr old by this time, I channeled my post-Olympics state of inspiration into swimming. I got more and more fit. I got stronger and stronger. And I got faster and faster. My sophomore year of high school I refused to eat dessert during the high school swim season and broke two high school records. (There may or may not have been a correlation between the diet and the records.) I kept swimming, trying to live and behave the way my teenager's perspective thought would befit a world champion swimmer.
Of course I never was a world champion swimmer. I swam in college for a strong division III program that produced several Div. III national champions. I loved training with these swimmers, swimming on relays with them, and achieving top 8 NCAA relay finishes and All-American accolades with them. And -- until I got mono my senior year in college, smack in the middle of the swim season -- I never counted myself out for being a Division III champion myself.
And then once the swim season ended my senior year in college, I had to start to figure out who I was aside from being a swimmer. I had long ago given up the dream of swimming in the Olympics -- I knew I would have needed to be competitive at a Division I school for that dream to continue. But I still defined myself, and my life, around those daily trips to the pool, the yards logged, the times clocked. And I still held my swimming role models in higher esteem than anyone from any other walk of life.
After I stopped spending nearly 3 hours a day at the pool, I discovered that there were a lot of other good things to do with that time. Once I had started to have time in my life for friends and dating, I realized I didn't really want to lose that time back to swimming. So, in a way, hanging up the swimsuit was a relief.
Yet, at the same time, hanging up my swimsuit left me unsure of what to aspire to. In athletics it is easy to set goals and measure progress. In the rest of life, that's not always the case. Nine years and two careers later, I'm still not sure what to aspire to. Perhaps that is why when I watch athletes who are truly at the top of their game there is a part of me that wants to dive back in (literally) and regain my former level of fitness. Or climb on a bike and build a new reputation in a new sport.
Yet I know I will never regain the fitness level I once had. Two to three hours of pool time now seems like a luxury -- I don't know many career-minded people who can afford to take that much time away from their careers, families, commutes, etc on a daily basis. I envy the people who are truly able to carve out workout time on a daily basis, and who manage to make athletic competition a part of their adult lives.
Perhaps that is why I admire the world-class athletes so much. They have succeeded on such a level as to be able to make their fitness their lifestyle. I envy people living a lifestyle that is based on fitness. Most of the rest of us are too sedentary, too tethered to email, and too driven by deadlines.
Or perhaps it is because they are driven by their own aspirations, instead of other peoples' goals and deadlines, that I envy these world-class athletes. To spend every day working toward a personal goal isn't something most of us get to do. Not unless we make that goal really simple -- like putting food on the table, or having a roof over our heads.
So, whatever the reason, I continue to be awed and inspired by these world class athletes. Now I just need to find an adult way to channel that inspiration.
